Dec 7, 2020 | Authenticity, Intention, Leadership, Personal Brand, Truth
I listened to a podcast recently featuring Seth Godin and his latest book, The Practice, where he proclaimed, “authenticity is a crock. Authenticity is overrated. Authenticity is a trap. No one wants you to be authentic.”
I’m a huge Seth Godin fan – I love his work and principles, but I completely disagree with him on this position. He professes that his position on authenticity is controversial, and I couldn’t agree more!
According to Godin, the only time in our lives when we’re truly authentic is when we’re an infant. When something doesn’t go our way, we spiral into a tantrum. Post toddler, we lose that raw, unabashed authenticity because our decisions and actions become calculated, carried out with intent and purpose (even if subconscious).
For example, you may not like something your boss does, but you’re not likely to go run screaming into their office, as that’s not likely to get you your desired result. What you do instead is weigh actions and consequences, navigate the political landscape, and moderate your behaviors. Godin considers this inauthentic – what you deep down most want to do is not what you end up doing in your actions.
“If you go see a concert,” he says “you don’t want the authentic musician. You want that musician (despite exhaustion from a 20-city road tour) to give you the best performance of their day, their week, their month. If you need surgery, you want the surgeon to ignore that they had an argument with their spouse and instead bring the best version of themselves. That’s what we want in every interaction.”
Godin continues, offering that people don’t want authenticity. What people want from you is consistency, humanity, and empathy…for you to deliver the best, most talented, skilled version of yourself. And the best way to deliver this is to do what comes naturally to you.
I read this. I hear this. And my response is, this IS authenticity – at least my definition of it.
For two weeks now, I’ve churned on Godin’s viewpoint that “authenticity is a crock.” I’ve wrangled with it internally and debated it with colleagues. Where I’ve landed is this:
- I have a deeply held belief about what authenticity is.
- To me, consistently delivering who you are IS being authentic. If humanity and empathy is core to who you are and you show up and deliver that, then you’re being authentic.
- Authenticity is being true to who you are, aligning with and living your values, and delivering on your personal brand promise day in and day out, regardless of whether or not people are watching.
- Being authentic is being the truest, realest me…the me-ist me I can be.
No, I’m not going to run into my boss’ office and throw a tantrum because something didn’t go as I had hoped. I refrain from doing this, not because I’m being inauthentic, but because my authentic self functions in a world where I’m keenly aware of rules, protocols, and the political landscape.
With this example and many more, I’ve learned about cause and effect, actions and consequences, and the culture of “this is the way we do things around here.” These lessons have saved my life, my career, and relationships. No, I won’t necessarily live out my unadulterated, unfiltered, raw self out on the street, in the boardroom, or even at my kitchen table necessarily, but it doesn’t mean that I’m not being congruent and authentic.
My clients know my skill, talent, values, and qualities. They know that when they work with me, they’re going to get these things fully and consistently. And I’m human, I can have a bad day, I can get overwhelmed and exhausted, and when these things happen, the impact can show up in my work. When it’s likely to, I name it, we adjust and adapt, change or reschedule…whatever the situation calls for. This is authenticity.
Hi, I’m Jeanie Duncan. I work with individuals and organizations as a transformation partner to help them unlock their Truth, discover authentic value, and create meaningful impact in the world. I believe when we are truly aligned with our purpose, we can live and perform at our highest potential. With over 25 years of experience as an executive, CEO, consultant, coach, and writer, I offer strategic, knowledgeable, and experienced guidance for those who are ready to take the courageous leap toward true transformation.
Nov 23, 2020 | Action, Authenticity, Courage, Freedom, Intention, Women
I got married a few weeks ago on October 10. As I fell asleep the night before, I meditated on an intention to be fully present on our wedding day. You know how weddings go – they’re chock full of endless tasks and details and a flurry of activity. I knew this was the reality and I wanted to let go and be fully present with Lyn, my wife-to-be, and our beautiful, precious ceremony.
As I drifted off, I wondered what it would feel like tomorrow when the day I had longed for finally arrived. I had imagined it a thousand times, playing the scenes over and over in my mind.
As I awoke that morning, what I hadn’t considered was this feeling that now washed over me – the deepest sense of gratitude. “I get to do this,” I thought. Just six years ago it wouldn’t have been possible to marry Lyn, to bond our love and commitment in the formal union of marriage.
I sat reflecting on those who came before me – those who advocated for this right of equality and were persecuted, prosecuted, and even gave their lives for it. The very freedoms and rights they fought for; many never were able to live it themselves. And here I sit, in my den, cozy under a blanket, sipping my coffee on my wedding day…I get to do this.
Audre Lorde, Marsha P. Johnson, Sylvia Rivera, Billie Jean King, Harvey Milk, Jack Baker, Michael McConnell, Edith Windsor, Jim Obergefell, Mary Bonauto, Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg, Justice Anthony Kennedy, Evan Wolfson, Evelyn and Walter Haas, Jr., and so many, many more.
I carried their spirit, perseverance, and legacy with me through the day, sustained in gratitude, committing to do far more than simply hold this feeling – to persist as they did, take action to ensure common humanity, freedoms, and rights for LGBTQ people. There is so much work that remains to be done.
Today, heading into Thanksgiving week 2020, where our pandemic world is turned upside down and inside out, Lyn and I have decided how we’ll celebrate the holiday this year. In the absence of not being able to gather with family and friends as we traditionally do, we’re preparing our dining table with place settings reserved for those whom we want to honor, celebrate, and give thanks. The seats will be taken, not only by champions who fought for LGBTQ freedoms and rights, but also by those who led the way for women’s rights, civil rights, and for democracy, equality, and inclusion.
It will be a Thanksgiving like none other…maybe one that’s here to stay.
Hi, I’m Jeanie Duncan. I work with individuals and organizations as a transformation partner to help them unlock their Truth, discover authentic value, and create meaningful impact in the world. I believe when we are truly aligned with our purpose, we can live and perform at our highest potential. With over 25 years of experience as an executive, CEO, consultant, coach, and writer, I offer strategic, knowledgeable, and experienced guidance for those who are ready to take the courageous leap toward true transformation.
Nov 17, 2020 | Creativity, Focus, Intention
A few weeks ago, I began the practice of “morning pages” again, and I feel the shifting of my internal tectonic plates.
For those unfamiliar with morning pages, the tool comes from Julia Cameron in her book, The Artist’s Way, where she guides readers on a path to freeing their internal creative self, and introduces this pivotal daily morning writing ritual.
The idea is that you awake and, first thing as you rise, free write for about 30 minutes, emptying yourself of thoughts, ideas, wonderings, and such. Keep the pen moving for 2–3 pages’ worth and whatever comes, comes. The purpose isn’t to produce anything spectacular, although sometimes you might! Simply write.
For the last ten years, I’ve been on again, off again with this practice. Every time I start back, I wonder why I ever stop. For in these pages over time, I’ve scoped out a yearlong sabbatical, launched a business, and discovered and claimed my identity as a gay woman. Shifting plates…
I think of morning pages as a writing meditation of sorts – I watch my thoughts and feelings flow from my pen onto paper as I release about events, experiences, and dreams, and with them, anger, fear, love, joy, loss, excitement. I let go, I imagine, I question, I leap. I’m safe here – free to be whoever I am in this space and be with whatever emerges.
A practice so simple, yet I feel its quake. This time, it’s revealing my inner creative, me claiming who I am as a writer. A professional writer. Not an amateur, or hobbyist, and my craft isn’t play or my sidekick – although the roar of resistance sometimes tries to convince me otherwise.
This time around while reading The Artist’s Way, a particular passage really stood out to me – the one where Cameron describes the shadow artist…
“Artists themselves, but ignorant of their true identity, shadow artists are to be found shadowing declared artists. They often choose shadow careers – those close to the desired art, even parallel to it, but not the art itself.”
“Artists love other artists. Shadow artists often gravitate to their rightful tribe but cannot yet claim their birthright. They want to write. They want to paint. They want to act, make music, dance…but they are afraid to take themselves seriously.”
“In order to move from the realm of shadows into the light of creativity, shadow artists must learn to take themselves seriously.”
I thought, “Could this be me?”
As I process coming out of this creative closet, it feels like the fruition of a decades-long crescendo.
- As a child, I grew up with arts and creativity. My older sister, Melinda, and I took piano lessons and played our entire childhood. I performed flute in the school band, sang in my church choir and school chorus, wrote for my school yearbook and newspaper, and took up photography as a hobby when I got a camera for high school graduation.
- In college, I studied journalism and wrote and photographed for university publications. And although I didn’t plan it, my early work out of college took me down a professional path of nonprofit arts administration – my first job with a private music academy, and a dozen years later I became CEO of an urban arts council…truly my dream job.
- When I left that post, I took a sabbatical for a few months to gain clarity on what would come next in my career. How did I spend the time? I painted for the first time in my life, I learned Spanish with my son, I took up guitar lessons again, and I started a blog as a new writing challenge – all arts-related pursuits. I’d spent so many years helping arts organizations and artists build capacity and develop resources, that I was drawn to finally explore my own creativity again. The space and playground of the sabbatical inspired me to start my own business focused on my passion of helping people and organizations transform.
- So attracted to artists I am, that I fell in love with one, and in October this year, I married Lyn Koonce – a professional contemporary folk musician. Music fills our home, and I have a front row seat to her amazing work and recent new album launch.
As I reflect back on this trajectory through my recent morning pages, I can see how central art and creative expression have been to who I am and who I’m becoming.
If indeed I have been the shadow artist Cameron describes, I feel myself emerging from that and claiming my artist self. I’m a bit in awe of the revelations that come from this practice. Plates shifting…
Hi, I’m Jeanie Duncan. I work with individuals and organizations as a transformation partner to help them unlock their Truth, discover authentic value, and create meaningful impact in the world. I believe when we are truly aligned with our purpose, we can live and perform at our highest potential. With over 25 years of experience as an executive, CEO, consultant, coach, and writer, I offer strategic, knowledgeable, and experienced guidance for those who are ready to take the courageous leap toward true transformation.
Sep 29, 2020 | Action, Authenticity, Courage, Intention
Years ago, while conducting research to start my business, I read the book, Birthing the Elephant by Karin Abarbanel and Bruce Freeman. In it, I came across a phrase that became a motto to me – “Act as if.”
Presented in the context of becoming an entrepreneur, Act As If conveys the concept of viewing yourself as this new brand and self image and aligning your actions and how you communicate and express yourself.
“Actions change attitudes, motions change emotions, and movements change moods. You might not be able to change your thoughts and your feelings, but you can change your actions. Your actions can change your feelings; your actions can change your thoughts. You can act differently than you feel.”
The day that I read those words, in October 2010, is the day I began my business. For several months prior, I had conducted research around launching a new venture, secured necessary resources, and written a business plan. On paper, it looked great, and when I read the words “act as if,” I thought “what am I waiting for?” I needed reminding…I’m more ready than I think I am. It’s interesting when you’re starting something from scratch. There’s a moment when you literally must flip the switch. So I did.
Act As If hit home for me. I took on the mantle of entrepreneur and business owner – I walked as if, ate as if, slept as if…I went about my day as if this is completely who I am, even though early on there were many days where it felt more like a story than reality. I lived this new brand as if everything in my life up to this moment had prepared me for this.
Now, 10 years later, through evolving iterations of my work, Act As If continues to be my motto, encouraging me to show up as both who I am and who I aspire to be. It helps move me to action when my doubt creeps in telling me I have to wait for the perfect plan before taking the first step. After all, our thoughts and actions create our reality. We manifest what we most desire and focus on.
Hi, I’m Jeanie Duncan. I work with individuals and organizations as a transformation partner to help them unlock their Truth, discover authentic value, and create meaningful impact in the world. I believe when we are truly aligned with our purpose, we can live and perform at our highest potential. With over 25 years of experience as an executive, CEO, consultant, and coach, I offer strategic, knowledgeable, and experienced guidance for those who are ready to take the courageous leap toward true transformation.
May 8, 2016 | Intention
I had the privilege this week of facilitating a program for leaders in eastern NC working to improve the overall health and wellness in their communities. These folks are so inspiring. The challenges they face are deep and complex and remind me of the importance of ensuring that our leaders are equipped with skills and resources to do their impactful work.
One of the exercises we completed together was around managing your energy, based on a Harvard Business Review article by the same title. The premise is to manage your energy, not your time. Our lives are so full and demanding, with work, family, and community obligations. Self care – if we think of it at all, often gets minimal if any priority at all. It can stretch us to our breaking point.
My favorite take aways from the article are:
- Work smarter, not harder. Resist the seductive allure of putting in more hours to get ahead. This can be a short term strategy on occasion but becomes unhealthy if sustained over time.
- Time is a finite resource. Energy is a different story. Energy comes from four main wellsprings within us: the body, emotions, mind, and spirit. In each, energy can be expanded and renewed by establishing and practicing specific rituals.
- Organizations need to shift their emphasis from getting more out of people to investing more in them, so they are motivated – and able – to bring more of themselves to work every day.
- Recognize the costs of your energy depleting behaviors and take personal responsibility for changing them. All it takes is beginning to implement simple practices one step at a time.
My group of participants came up with a few best practices in each area. The list was so good, I wanted to share it with you. I hope you find some good ideas for yourself and add more of your own!
Spiritual:
- Be in nature
- Pray
- Play music
- Keep things in perspective
- Let your light shine
- Express gratitude…often
- Enjoy the moment(s)
- Laugh (especially at yourself)
- Stay away from negative people.
- Follow your passion
- Journal
- Forgive and move on
- Avoid toxic situations
Emotional:
- Play music
- Journal
- Practice yoga
- Meditate
- Exercise
- Call friends, family, confidants
- Eat ice cream
- Drink vino…especially with a good friend
- Discern which battles are worth fighting
- Take a long, relaxing drive
- Walk, run
- Listen to inspirational words, messages
- Practice deep breathing
- Use essential oils
- Cry
- Hold a baby / pet
- Watch TV that inspires and relaxes you (Oprah, Undercover Boss, etc)
Mental:
- Do relaxation exercises
- Close your eyes and imagine your favorite place (take a brief mental vacation)
- At work, close your door and relax for 15-20 mins
- Take a mental health day
- Listen to your favorite music
- Stop the cycle – interrupt the process
- Retail therapy
- Pedicure – spa day
- Breathe
- Do something for someone else
- Spend time w/ people who cheer you
- Read
- Meditate
- Practice yoga
Physical:
- Work out regularly
- Get plenty of sleep
- Take on a project that excites you
- Eat well
- Connect with a hobby
- Get outside
- Spend time with family
- Enjoy an adult beverage…especially with a friend
- Drink H2O
- Limit sugar intake
- Socialize
- Garden
- Train for something, like a triathlon
- Get active! Run, bike, sail, surf, wake board
- Walk daily
- Yoga
- Cooking
- “Break the fast” – start your day with a healthy meal to fuel you
- Read for enjoyment
- Spend time with pets
About Jeanie Duncan: Jeanie is President of Raven Consulting Group, a business she founded that focuses on organizational change and leadership development in the nonprofit sector. She is a senior consultant for Raffa, a national firm working with nonprofit clients to lead efforts in sustainability and succession planning, executive transition and search. Additionally, Jeanie serves as adjunct faculty for the Center for Creative Leadership, a top-ranked, global provider of executive leadership education.
Jul 21, 2015 | Courage, Intention, Leadership
This quote has always been a favorite of mine. And it’s taking on new meaning after going skydiving with a girlfriend and our sons. It was an exhilarating experience with many rich take-a-ways.
Skydiving is something I’ve always been terrified of, but really wanted to do. When I stop to think about it, it’s not often words like ‘terror’ and ‘desire’ go together in the same sentence.
I believe most of all, I wanted to prove to myself that I could be that afraid of something and still do it. I had this unbridled anticipation that if I could just do it, it would be one of the most amazing experiences ever – soaring, floating, free.
It was all of that. And more.
For a long time, my fear paralyzed this dream. Eventually, I grew tired of hearing my own whining voice (as did my friends), continually expressing my longing to do it and talking myself out of it with endless excuses. I decided – ENOUGH! It’s time to accept my fear and move directly into it.
Having now taken the leap, I realize the powerful metaphor that skydiving is for both fear and freedom. As for fear, there are many things that I’m afraid of. Yet, when I face the fear head-on, it often vanishes…or at least shrinks. And there in its place is a surprising gift – freedom.
This plays out for me in work situations like public speaking and dealing with a challenging client situation, or on the personal side such as sailing in intense conditions with high winds or heavy weather, or mountain biking a technically difficult trail.
This experience is a reminder to examine the task and its importance, purpose, and impact, while weighing the risks and rewards.
A little part of me even believes that acting on this insane courage unlocks some deep, hidden ‘magic power.’ That now – from out of nowhere! – I will leap tall buildings and blast fire from my fingertips…or at least the mortal equivalent of having greater confidence and faith that I ‘can do it’ and it will all work out.
Lastly, I’m left thinking of everything I would have missed had I stopped short of jumping. Bold moves launch us out of our comfort zone and open us up. You can’t help but expand when free falling 120 mph at 12,000 feet! I’ll never see things quite the same again.
Lessons in courage from skydiving:
- Embrace fear and take action anyway. I don’t think it’s about overcoming the fear or that it goes away.
- With any given situation, explore the worst-case scenario, gauge your comfort level, tap into your resources, and work backward to develop a plan from there.
- Take action that helps make you more comfortable. In this case of skydiving, I consulted with others who had done it and sought their advice, researched (exceptionally) reputable skydiving companies to ensure they have (highly) trained professionals and excellent equipment. Risk mitigation!
- Do things often that take your breath away.
- Get out of your comfort zone…sometimes far, far outside. This is where real learning and living takes place. Life is more fun and interesting if it is a series of amazing adventures.
- Be fully present in life – the skydiving free-fall lasts only 60 seconds, and the entire experience is over in 7 minutes. The impact; however, lasts a lifetime.
- Surround yourself with spicy friends who’ll call you out on living small.
About Jeanie Duncan: Jeanie is President of Raven Consulting Group, a business she founded that focuses on organizational change and leadership development in the nonprofit sector. She is a senior consultant for Raffa, a national firm working with nonprofit clients to lead efforts in sustainability and succession planning, executive transition and search. Additionally, Jeanie serves as adjunct faculty for the Center for Creative Leadership, a top-ranked, global provider of executive leadership education.
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